getting in touch

[rdfreak]

well, I often like to reflect in here about friendship; the good and the bad. it's my journal and I'll cry if I want too. I'm always a peoples person and value my friends very damn highly. I also like to think I am very loyal.
apart from those stupid couple of nuts who have decided for whatever reason to end our friendship, I feel that this year (and in some cases before it) I have been not as good as I should be in keeping friends. This year without a doubt I went through some struggles, as per usual for me. but, I had made some great friends (mostly online) whom I have found it hard to keep up with.
I've tried to detatch myself from the net a bit, and mostly that's a good thing. but it means I do risk losing some very good friends I have made online.
Sometimes this year, I have felt lost cos I felt I lost a lot of those good friends.
This morning after being on the zone for a while, I decided to get on ventrilo - something I hadn't done in ages. I was welcomed big time and it honestly makes me feel very good. For whatever reason, a couple want to reunite with me. and another one wonders cos I don't talk to them a lot - a few people do actually. I explain that it's not just them. I am always saying that and it's starting to really annoy me! It's a lot easier, especially online, to lose contact with people if you don't make the effort!
As I told louise_1985 this morning, it was honestly making me sad that I had failed to get the MD recordings to her from her b/day. I can be so slack, especially when its technology that I have to work a bit with to get it going. luckily she is very understanding! I can be slack sometimes but I'm glad I'm not hated for it!
so yeh, it was just good to reunite with a lot of them this morning, except it's a shame that I learnt Maddog was behind all that saga with my zone community leader thing ending. Him and Liam, and cos it seemed that J couldn't make his own decisions, well .. that's what happened. anyway Maddog and myself use to get along quite well. am not even sure what I did but hey, that's all over now; water under the bridge. We're civil which is the main thing I guess.
hmm OK, (since I've started it) the reason I wonder if J can make his own decisions is cos of that whole community leader thing. We planned for me to attend the community leader staff meeting, then a day later I was shut out and, I have only recently found out it was maddog and L who were behind that. what I ever did to L I don't know! sometimes people just amaze me! but ah well, these, as I say, are my thoughts only in my own journal. I am over it now; you'd think I should be, after two years. course though, like anything, when things are brought back up, one has to reflect on these happenings.
I just felt overwhelmed again and went off on a totally different tanjent; go me! :)
So, I need to make an effort of keeping in touch with friends online as well as off. I certainly do have a few closer friends overseas.
yeh for my rambly rambly rambles.
Til next time, RdFreak

Comments

[rdfreak.livejournal.com]

:)ah you're very sweet! nah i haven't forgotten you either of course. I'm sure we'll plan to meet up while you're here in aussie land. :)
Cheers