rdfreak: (Default)
rdfreak ([personal profile] rdfreak) wrote2004-08-09 08:47 pm

the bad with the good

Well today was a pretty cool day! But man it is sooo easy to take the guide dogs for granted. I felt sooo stupid with my cane today. finding the bus and train doors, were all was quite a tricky task, but I'm here!
Met t at flinders, then we set off on to Brunswik and were looking on the wrong Lygan street, so we got kinda lost but ended up on the correct tram which got us there about 12, but the movie has already started half an hour earlier so we decided to go have some lunch and catch the next session. T and I were saying how cool it was as finally we were catching up outside of TAFE Lol! anyway, before 1 we went up stairs and bumped into C and s who were also coming to our session.
It was interesting really .. So anti-Bush it was unbelievable! and .. I followed it mostly except for the occasional visual scene and the politics and war-jaggen that I will never understand it would seem. :( It was very funny in parts, but extremely sad in others.
Then T and I caught the tram back to flinders and I went back to parents for tea.
Well .. I was crossing the tracks at Mitcham station, and .. I had felt soooo self-conscious of my cane and how stupid and clumbsey I must have been looking that .. well .. I was lucky to prevent a nasty accident. .. Well, I was trying to be all Miss-discrete with my damn cane, so I started off from the gate, going to cross to the other side, but I must have veered (as I use to do all the time with a cane - though of course I had always been safe with it when crossing the tracks) .. anyway I had walked over the first lot of tracks but came to some sleepers that are inbetween the two lanes of track. So instead of trying to trail along to the right (since I was worried I might take too much time) I backed up and tried again, but did the same thing. I was panicking as I never usually like to be on the tracks for more than a second. So I was just kinda half stepping on to the sleeper when I heard .. an announcement for a city-bound train. .. I have never been so uneasy in all my life. I knew i wouldn't have time to try and get out as the gates would shut and even worse, that I would still be standing on the track. So here I am, and all of a sudden .. I automatically screamed "nooooo!" then this guy raced up and steered me out! I was a bit histericle, but despite this I thanked him heaps (he probably thought "what's this idiot doing out here when she doesn't know what she's doing?) and told him i was OK to continue on to Mum's car - as we'd arranged for her to pick me up!
I was kinda in shock and yeah .. for the rest of that night, I wasn't myself, and practically came home straight after tea. .. I feel OK now though. Cos probably that this house is my home and i can do anything and be anyone and it's just .. my safe haven!
Anyway I was questioning dad again about all the war and stuff. I so thought that 9/11 and the Irac war were connected, but now I think i know why.
Also I am now a Zone community leader/admin chick .. so that's a good thing .. since I seem to live there now, Lol nah not really! but yeah .. I will try and be nice and not delete those anagram cheaters lol hahaha! Nah .. I'd lose the job if I did that Lol hahaha!
Well yeah .. today was a good day - apart from the train thing which .. yeah .. I don't know why I was sooo shocked. If I'd mannaged to astral-project, I guess I wouldn't be so fearful but anyway ... I'm safe and I'm warm. I got to be warm and I got to be happy and .. furfill me destiny! anyway ...
I was then starting to wonder what a better invention would be than a wretched cane! and getting myself all worked up over that. Then, i thought the next person I hear complaining cos a sightie grabbed there arm, I will scream at them! .. sure, it can be confronting, but they are only concerned for our safety. There are sure nicer ways of educating the public than what I have heard some folks do/say/shout/scream!
T and I got closer today - as one would suspect. But .. there's this weird sense of security knowing that i can still be "a good friend" despite me grabbing their arms. I mean .. Yeah I've always been in that mind set, but I still do remind myself of that .. and I feel funny -- in a good way when people think I'm nice/a good person because .. for some reason I keep thinking that "I can't be a nice friend cos I'm blind" but I know it's wrong! .. just a little imperfection of mine I guess.
OK i'm going to bed early tonight. Oh btw, I ended up falling back to sleep this morning, having all these strange dreams and forcing myself to get up at about 8! Lol!
OK I go.
Til Next time, RdFreak

[identity profile] toxic-tears-573.livejournal.com 2004-08-09 09:06 am (UTC)(link)
omg i don't think i know any one that writes as much as you do... but that cool cause you share alot and are an open person. A+

[identity profile] rdfreak.livejournal.com 2004-08-09 02:21 pm (UTC)(link)
well this is my only journal now .. so yes I do write a lot - well sometimes I go through stages where I don't but yeah .. I do this for the benefit of my future of course mainly. Only difference is I share with others, and I don't mind that at all - in fact, as I've always said, I benefit from it, making sure I can trust all my LJ friends with my private entries.
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